Can You Love Without Trust?

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Can you love without trust?

Photo by Avel Chuklanov on Unsplash

It’s tough to rebuild a relationship after a breach of trust

Years ago, my husband took flying lessons. He wanted to complete his pilot’s license in order to fly a small plane.

I supported his dream — both emotionally and financially — and looked forward to the day when we would enjoy the open skies together.

One sunny afternoon, my husband invited me to join him on one of his last training flights. I accepted.

At the airport, I shook the hand of his instructor and walked across the tarmac with the two of them to the little Cessna.

I sat in the back of the cozy 4-seater as my husband took the driver’s seat. We taxied down the runway, gaining speed until we left the ground and became airborne.

My stomach did a flip-flop as we climbed further into the sky, but it settled as the plane levelled out and cruised along. I didn’t pay attention to what was happening in the cockpit but rather focused on looking down at the world below.

I’d been in big planes flying over the Atlantic Ocean, but I’d never been in such a small plane flying over the highway.

I’d started to relax and enjoy the views — when the engine quit. The plane seemed suspended in the air. My husband and his flight instructor were talking.

I leaned forward to listen. I caught snippets of them discussing where to land. Which field would be best to land in? To crash land.

To crash land?!

We have no engine? We’re going to crash!

My heart flip-flopped along with my stomach as I searched the back seat for a barf bag.

My first trip in a small plane and I was going to die. I didn’t want to die. I was too young to die.

My legs shook, my fingers tingled, and my ears rang. I felt faint.

I don’t know if I actually fainted, but I came to when the cabin noise changed from a hum to a whooshing noise. The engine was back on. We started to climb again.

Halleluia! I’m not going to die.

Just then the instructor turned to me and asked how I enjoyed the practice.

“The practice?”

He explained that it was a test. He was walking my husband through the steps necessary in the event of a crash landing.

“You mean it wasn’t real?” I stammered.

“Well, I did turn the engine off, but we had planned for this. He knew I was doing it as I did it.”

If I still didn’t need the instructor to help us land safely, I would’ve reached forward and throttled him. Instead, through clenched teeth, I told them to return to the airport. Now!

I couldn’t believe that they hadn’t thought to include me in their plans to “fake” crash the plane. I couldn’t fathom that they didn’t take into account my feelings as a first-time, small-plane flyer. They didn’t show any consideration or care.

I had trusted my husband. That trust was damaged.

Sadly, that trust continued to be broken and our marriage ended 10 years later.

Love doesn’t exist without trust in a real relationship.

But there is One whose trust has never failed. God deserves my trust because He gave me His Son to die in my place.

God has proven faithful time and time again.

He is worthy of my trust.

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